Desperate Times Call For Desperate Measures

dbags.jpgThe time has come, friends. The time to break out your fancy, trendy “Sedona red” duds. The time to look south of Chavez Ravine and send all your best wishes to our new best friends, the Arizona Diamondbacks. 

What am I talking about, you ask? Why would a Dodger blog support a bitter rival? Well, this falls under the “an enemy of my enemy is my friend” theory. Let’s face it, folks – the Dodgers just aren’t catching the Diamondbacks for the NL West title. That ship has sailed. I don’t even feel that bad about it – sure, the Dodgers have massively underachieved, but how can you explain a team as mediocre as Arizona having the record they do? They’ve been outscored on the season by 32 runs, yet they’re 17 games over .500. How is that even possible? According to Baseball Prospectus’ Pythagorean records, they ought to be 5 games under at 61-66. By contrast, the Oakland Athletics have outscored their opponents by 6 runs, yet are 2 games under .500. I mean, what can you do about that? This might just be one of those years in the desert.  

The point is, the Snakes should no longer even be on our radar screen. We’re just not making up 6.5 games in a month. But, as bad as the Blue have played lately, it’s not unreasonable to still look at the wild card, where the Dodgers are only 3.5 out. Sure, it’s not the same as winning the division, but ask all the folks in Red Sox Nation if getting in as the wild card really cheapened their 2004 World Series win. I’m going to say, “no.”But while we don’t care about what Arizona does, we do need to care about what the Padres do, since they’re currently leading the NL wild card race. So nothing could help the Blue more right now than for the D-Backs to waltz into San Diego and whomp the Friars.  

Of course, none of that will matter if the Dodgers don’t, you know, win a game every now and then. With Washington coming in to town, followed by a head-to-head with San Diego, now-ish would be a great time to start.

- Mike Scioscia’s tragic illness msti-face.jpg

David Wells: the Aftermath

Well, it wasn’t always pretty. And I thought wells-la-small.jpgwe’d nearly need to call the paramedics after he laid down a bunt and hustled to first. But you know what? Boomer did pretty well for the Blue just now. In 5 innings, Wells gave the team a pretty solid chance to win. Sure, he got himself into a nasty bases-loaded jam in the 5th – but he also got himself out of it by striking out Moises Alou on a curveball in the dirt.

Wells’ stats:

IP: 5.0
H: 7
BB: 3
ER: 2
R: 2
K: 2
Pitches: 73 (48 strikes)

Not to mention, his bunt hit (!!) that became the go-ahead run at the time he left. (I like this: it’s his 7th career run scored in his 21 year career.) Are those the stats of an ace? Hell no. But do you really think Brett Tomko was going to be anywhere near as effective tonight? Not a chance. For a 44-year old fat dude who spent the last three weeks surfing, this is the most any of us could have asked for.

- Mike Scioscia’s tragic illness msti-face.jpg

David Wells Is A Funny Guy

Alternate title: “Brett Tomko Classy Enough To Take Jokes After Being DFA’d”.

Hey, say what we will about Brett Tomko – and I have – the following story makes me like him awellslaughing1.jpg whole lot more as a person for taking his fate with a lot of class. As for David Wells, making jokes to a guy whose job you just took – about the job you just took – isn’t really the nicest thing you can do.. unless it’s actually funny. And, well, this is. At least he makes fun of himself just as much.

From Steve Henson’s Yahoo! blog:

To make room for Wells, the Dodgers severed ties with veteran right-hander Brett Tomko, designating him for assignment. In a surreal scene, Tomko talked to reporters about his fate while Wells, an unapologetic jokester, dressed not two feet away at the next locker.

Tomko: “I’m OK with it. Last night I saw it coming.”

Wells: “Really? You saw it on the sports ticker?”

Tomko: “Funny.”

Tomko: “I hope the (general manager Ned Colletti) can get me to another team and not let me sit around and rot. I’ll go home and start throwing at the local high school field. I don’t know what to do first, it’s uncharted territory.”

Wells: “You’ve got to find a catcher.”

The Dodgers kept Tomko on the roster through Thursday, allowing him to reach 10 years of major league service time and guaranteeing him the maximum pension.

Tomko: “That was important. It’s a good time for me. I’m ready for a new opportunity. And it’s not like they brought in a chump to replace me.”

Wells: “Yeah, they did.”

Well, David, you’re right – the needle is starting out at ‘chump’. But hey, let’s see what you can do. I know you always dig the big stage – how’s a nationally-televised Sunday night game in New York strike you?

- Mike Scioscia’s tragic illness msti-face.jpg

My Brain Is Leaking Out My Ear

This isn’t quite Dodgers-related.. but I did hear it on the SNY broadcast of the Mets/Dodgers game, so close enough – this is so dumb, I couldn’t help myself.

SNY commentators Gary Cohen, Keith Hernandez, an432803490_8043ae2ee7.jpgd Ron Darling were discussing the recent announcement of the Rawlings All-Time Gold Glove Team, which included former Dodgers 1B Wes Parker. After agreeing that Hernandez should have won over Parker – which, you know, fine, Parker isn’t a very well-known name anymore – they turned to the second base winner, Joe Morgan. Which, my distaste for Morgan’s awful baseball commentating aside, is a ridiculous choice when second basemen like Bill Mazeroski and Roberto Alomar are considered.

Anyway, this is me paraphrasing, not a direct quote – but this is what Keith Hernandez said, after Gary Cohen said he’d have taken Alomar:

I think Joe Morgan was the right choice for this honor, because he was a better all-around second baseman. I mean, he can’t hold up to Alomar when you’re talking defensively, but all-around, Morgan was definitely better.

*sigh*.. Keith. You DO know what they award the Gold Glove for, right?

- Mike Scioscia’s tragic illness msti-face.jpg